Kevin O’Leary’s Cold Hard Truth on Collaborative Divorces

By Meredith Cox

Kevin O’Leary is everywhere.  On the internet, on the radio, on bookshelves and on television (Dragon’s Den, Shark Tank and The Lang & O’Leary Exchange). In his new book, Cold Hard Truth on Men, Women & Money, Canada’s financial guru shares his opinions on just about everything from the use of Botox and fillers to “How to Spot a Gold Digger”.  He says we should repair our finances and not our faces.  Good to know.  He insists rich people need a prenup because good looking gold diggers are willing to date a person who is a lot older, uglier and wealthier than they are for profit.  No shock there!  We can all silently come up with tons of celebrity and real life examples.  Hmmm…

The book’s brutally honest dissection of our relationships with each other and money makes a lot of sense.  As I read through the chapters relating to each stage of life, I reflected on where I might have gone wayward. I thought hard about the perils of “Ghost Money” (lattes, lunches and glossy magazines).  I inwardly promised to do better and congratulated myself on the smart decisions I had managed to implement so far.  From now on the balance in my “Money Karma” account will be on a perpetual upswing.

As a Family Lawyer, I was pleased to learn Mr. O’Leary also has strong views on the merits of Collaborative Divorce.  Unlike the traditional litigation model, collaboratively trained lawyers are not adversaries.  They will work with you and the other lawyer to obtain the best outcome possible for your family.  In his analysis of how to fix or prevent various money mistakes available to us as we go through life, he gives a concise prescription for avoiding the twin legacies of agony and financial bleeding that can go along with divorce court.  I have broken it down into two categories:  no cost self-help and outside help you have to pay for.

SELF-HELP AND YOUR CHILDREN

1.  Be compassionate and respectful to your spouse.  Don’t let rage and jealousy cloud your judgment.  You might end up spending more money.

2.  Do your own research on the law and the process that will work best for you.

3.  Get and organize all your financial information.  Make your own copies to save money.

4.  Money you have set aside as RESP’s for the children should remain in place for their benefit.

5. Put your children’s needs first.

OUTSIDE HELP

1.  Don’t try to divide your assets without getting some professional help.  It can be complicated.  Property settlements are permanent.

2.  Get lots of counselling from a mental health professional.  Stay in counselling.

3.  Find a collaborative lawyer.  Consider mediation.  Avoid going to court.